What better way to mourn the passing of the holiday season than with really bad, holiday-based\u00a0poetry?\u00a0 Enjoy and Happy New Year!<\/p>\n
*\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 *\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 *<\/p>\n
\u2018Twas the night before Christmas and Sierra the Mouse,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Was thrashing and flailing all over the house,<\/p>\n
Stealing the covers, beating mom half to death,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The faint scent of candy cane still on her breath.<\/p>\n
Her mother rolled over and tried not to chide<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The sweet sleeping child awake by her side.<\/p>\n
Her thoughts turned to fancy, her mind running free,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Though not far, I\u2019m sure, as they\u2019re always of me.<\/p>\n
I, for my part, was alone in the house,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Unable to sleep like my good friend the Mouse.<\/p>\n
Tomorrow was Christmas and I couldn\u2019t wait,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The best part of the year is this cold winter date.<\/p>\n
Downstairs I knew that good Jeffrey would dream<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Of Hans Zimmer scores and choc\u2019late chip streams.<\/p>\n
Rebecca lay arrogant, smug in her bed<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No visions of sugar plums danced in her head.<\/p>\n
She had assured me full numerous times<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That I would reduce to strict pantomimes<\/p>\n
My copious joy at her Christmas gift.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Such arrogance always I do give short shrift.<\/p>\n
I held out no hope for anything good<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 While secretly hoping like any boy would.<\/p>\n
Upstairs lay Mom in her jungle gym bed<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Done in long ago:\u00a0 booze goes to her head.<\/p>\n
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Not knowing quite how that he\u2019d find them there.<\/p>\n
But the Big Guy had never failed once, never missed.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Faithfully finding all those on his list.<\/p>\n
So we laid out the cookies close by on a chair,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The egg nog still chill in the cold winter air.<\/p>\n
Then in the distance I heard a long moan<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That started real soft and grew to a drone.<\/p>\n
A train was a\u2019comin\u2019, the Polar Express!<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But I was too old.\u00a0 That made me depressed.<\/p>\n
So I thought of the gifts and the tree piled high,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Just to the ceiling, not quite to the sky.<\/p>\n
Fulfilling our dreams, and then every wish<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Would be granted in full.\u00a0 And dinner!\u00a0 Delish!<\/p>\n
For what could be better on a cold winter\u2019s day<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Than family and table, save those far away?<\/p>\n
Our wishes go out to those far and wide<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Who cannot be home by their family\u2019s side.<\/p>\n
We wish you the best in holiday cheer<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And pray that you\u2019ll be there real soon for next year.<\/p>\n
For holidays are nothing without those we love.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They go together like hands in a glove.<\/p>\n
So keep yourself safe and come home real soon.<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We\u2019ll save you some turkey, just not until June.<\/p>\n
For the magic of Christmas, we learn when we grow,<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Is not the presents but all those we know.<\/p>\n
So as the man said when he rode out of sight<\/p>\n
\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cMerry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
What better way to mourn the passing of the holiday season than with really bad, holiday-based\u00a0poetry?\u00a0 Enjoy and Happy New Year! *\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 *\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 * \u2018Twas the night before Christmas and Sierra the Mouse, \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Was thrashing and flailing all over the house, Stealing the covers, beating mom half to death, \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The faint scent … Continue reading